There are many moments which mark your life, moments when you realise nothing will ever be the same, and time is divided into two parts: BEFORE this and AFTER this.

2017 has been a year filled with big moments for our family, with milestones and much to be celebrated – matric, a university graduation and many significant family birthdays – until our world fell apart in the early hours of Saturday morning, 18 November 2017, in the most shattering, brutal and heartbreaking way.

We were victims of an armed robbery in our home just after 3am and my husband, Simon, was tragically and senselessly shot and killed when he opened the patio door to check why our dog was barking. My youngest son, Matthew, who is writing matric, was held at gunpoint, I was fortunately able to lock myself in the bathroom with my cellphone and call for help. My eldest son Ryan, was not home, thank goodness. Matthew and I were unharmed, and the intruders left with what they could carry.

We are all extremely traumatised, and taking each day as it comes, moment by moment. We are still too shocked to even be angry, although we know this attack has shocked and angered so many of you, both near and far. We so appreciate and value the strength of your unity behind us. A murder investigation is underway, and we hope there will be closure.

Our heartfelt gratitude to so many of you who have taken the time to express your love, concern and support for me and my family. If I am quiet for a time, or you receive emails from someone else on my behalf, please understand while we mourn my husband, a gentle giant, who was such a wonderful dad to our two children.

We have so much to come to terms with, so many questions to ask, so that LIFE AFTER THIS, can begin……thank you for holding the space for us.

With much love

Gentleness | Dignity | Respect | Courage

My husband was a quiet and often unwitting collaborator in helping me to create the work that you all share in today. Simon helped me to find my voice, whether on paper or when speaking behind a microphone. He freed me up to pursue my passion, quietly and gently, as only he could.

He provided me with many colourful parenting stories that have become an inspiration to so many. We loved doing the parenting dance together. I feel an ache in my heart when I think about all the boisterous banter with the Bush Boys that will be missing from our home without Simon’s presence.

On 9 November we celebrated our 26th wedding anniversary. He was the witness to my life for so many years – all the everyday parts of my life, the perfect and the imperfect. A thousand moments that I had just taken for granted – mostly because I had assumed there would be a thousand more…

Go well my Si. Be at peace. Your sons will continue to carry your legacy of treating others with care, dignity, gentleness and respect; characteristics you embodied and that you instilled in them so well.



Nikki would really like to continue to hear from you over this difficult time, especially with the holiday season ahead. Can we ask you to please post your messages at the bottom of this page, where she can access them when she is ready.

With thanks,

(Nikki’s sister)


So many of you have asked how you can support me and my family during this difficult time. If you would like to do something meaningful for us, in the light of the circumstances of Simon’s passing, and in memory of him, we would love you to donate to the DNA Project where these funds will be utilised to fight crime in our beautiful country:


The DNA Project is a registered non-profit, public benefit organization that recognizes the critical importance of DNA evidence in the resolution of crime. It is committed to advancing justice through the expanded use of DNA evidence in conjunction with a national DNA criminal intelligence database, also known as a ‘National DNA Database’. The DNA Project hopes that its efforts will translate into the comprehensive use of DNA analysis for crime detection and prevention in South Africa. (Read More…)