Nikki Bush in conversation with educational psychologist, Dr. Ken Resnick. While we may be living in a global pandemic, we are also experiencing a pandemic of parental guilt and overprotection, which does neither children nor their parents any favours. Ken is the founder of the evidence-based Smart Choice Parenting Programme which helps parents and children with the full spectrum of childhood developmental problems, from poor school performance and refusing to brush teeth, to regressive issues like sleeping in a parent’s bed, to extreme disorders such as bedwetting, ADD and more.
For more information visit www.nikkibush.com or www.smartchoiceparenting.co.za
The conversation covers:
- The phenomenon of parental guilt and how it puts children in charge
- How to stop children from hitting your “hot buttons”
- Why over-protecting children can sabotage them in the long run
- The power of helping children make good choices versus the need to discipline them
- What children’s choices are telling us
- Side-stepping the emotional melodrama of parenting
- How parents need to position themselves as an authority figure, without shouting at their children and losing control
- The concept of learned helplessness
- The journey from dependence to independence
- How to help children feel safe
“Parenting is an irrational activity. We protect our kids, we love them, we do everything for them and they are miserable.”
Dr. Ken Resnick, Educational Pyschologist
“If our ancestors had parented kids like we do today, we would be extinct”
Dr. Ken Resnick, Educational Pyschologist
” We think kids feel things, which they don’t feel, kids don’t feel guilty, they are all about themselves. They are born into the world subjective, where the world revolves around them”
Dr. Ken Resnick, Educational Pyschologist
“Parents are really taking strain, yet all the therapy is on the child”
Dr. Ken Renswick, Educational Pyschologist
“Because children can’t bring themselves up, parents have to be in charge. A parent is an authority figure in their child’s life. This is different to being authoritarian.”
Dr. Ken Renswick, Educational Pyschologist
“You want to make a child, aware that they are choosing a consequence. The child knows, for instance, if he makes a bad choice, he is choosing the consequence.”
Dr. Ken Renswick, Educational Pyschologist
“Our job is to help instil some sort of meaning to life for children, meaning to reading, meaning to a mess-up, they just don’t have to be entertained.”
Dr. Ken Resnick, Educational Pyschologist
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